Let’s get rid of guilt

Have you found as a new parent you just can’t get through your to-do list each day?

Does the words “I should have, I could of, I have to” sound familiar?

Not being able to achieve our daily tasks we set for ourselves can lead to feelings of frustration, exhaustion (as if we need more), no motivation and worse the G word . . . .

Why do we feel guilty when realistically we are giving our time, energy and self to another fully dependent human (baby, not your partner!)?

These feelings of guilt and failure are not helpful and make us feel more depleted. So how do we change it?

We all have built in mental strategies to get by however, when you are tired, hungry and just don’t feel yourself it is hard to implement them.

ASK . . . “What is reasonable and realistic, in my current circumstances, to get done?”

Start with a list of what you HAVE done in the day.

Simple things are still tasks that you have achieved. Bring awareness to the fact that you do get things done.

This could be getting out of bed and having a shower. As a new mum this can be a time consuming task!

Make a new list for the following day of THREE tasks only.

To start your motivations on a roll prioritise the ones that hit your intrinsic moves. These are behaviours that make you feel internally satisfied and have meaning. This actually can be cleaning your kitchen because you feel happy and satisfied. (extrinsic motivation is behaviours for a reward e.g. like doing something for money).

Bottom line is: focus on creating a short to-do list, which is achievable and has meaning to you and your family. No guilt.

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